shades of grey..

I promised I'd be good
I said I'd never go astray
but back then I thought
that I'd always know my way

I promised to stay in line
I said I'd always pray
but back then I thought
I knew the night from day

I said I'd always be nice
and the truth I'd always say
but life was then a bed of roses
not just a game people play

I said I'd follow all the rules
and I tried to always obey
but back then you promised
that you'd never go away

I promised to be faithful
I said I'd never betray
But then it was all black and white
there were no shades of gray

is it?

When I am happy with what I am
Am I happily satiated ?
or just plain complacent?

When I love people despite being hated in return
Is my love unconditional?
or am I just being stupid?

When I am pretending to be happy
Is it better than being sad?
or am I just being fake?

When certain things don't bother me
Is that being mature
or am I being indifferent?

When sometimes I just don't care
Am I being strong
or is it just insensitivity?

When I pour my soul out in a poem
Is it being expressive?
Or am I wearing my heart on my sleeve?