being

I don't want to

dress up or dress down
wear a smile or a frown
be shallow or be deep
give away or keep
go out or stay in
be pure or commit a sin
love or hate
sleep or stay awake
be jealous or indifferent
be dumb or intelligent
be enthused or subdued
make peace or a fued
keep moving or stay still
be empty or be full
progress or digress
stay clean or create a mess
be kind or be callous
take in stride or create a fuss

i just want to be
yes thats the only wish from me

if you were

If you were a song
you'd be the only one I sing

If you were a bell
you'd be the only one I ring

If you were a feeling
you'd be the only one I feel

If you were a movie
you'd be the only one I see

If you were a thought
you'd be the only one I think

If were a drink
you'd be the only one I drink

If you were a flower
you'd be the one I always pick

If you were medicine
I'd always be sick

If you were a place
you'd be the only one I go to

If you were a job
you'd be the only one I'd ever do

If you were a poem
you'd be the only one I write

If you were a mistake
I'd hate to be right

if you were a book
you'd be the only one I read

but you are a guy
you are the only one I need

a soul in solitude

i'll always have

the wind
to gently caress me
to play with my hair
and leave it in a lovely mess

the rain
to beautifuly drench my body
to revive and refresh my soul
with those gorgeous raindrops

the sun
to fill my life with light
and every time i'm cold
provide me warm warmth

the girl in my mirror
to talk to me
to comfort me
to support me
to love me

i'll always have me

moving on

yes i think its finally happened
i've learnt to let go
and yes i forgive you
i didn't mean to create a row
all the anger has fizzled away
all thar remains is a hurt soul
i never meant to hurt you
like you didn't mean to play foul
i'd put a lot of trust in you
and was refusing to see reality
but its finally sunk in now
and i'm never going to believe in fantasy
this isn't the first time anyway
and you aren' the first person to scar
i'll jus be more careful now
i'll be near but i'll stay afar

terror....26/11

terror strikes
like a snake it rises its ugly head
its evil eyes..contemptful
it spits and hisses
and spares no one
indiscriminate...pure and poisonous
it bites all...no regrets

when it slithered into our world
no one knows
for how long its laid there
waiting and preparing to strike

we ask questions now
we scream after the kill

why didn't anyone see or recongnise it?
what chameleonistic trick did it do?

we give it exotic names
and play blame games
who is the charmer behind the snake?
why did we take so long to rise and wake?

alone..but not afraid

i've cut myself away from the world
not because i don't belong
but i no longer want to

we were very different leaves
but atleast we belonged to the same tree
have i detatched myself and flown away?
or have the others gone
and only i remain?


i don't understand anything anymore
why they laugh or why they cry
why they fail or why they try
i can't sympathise
or empathise with anyone
i can no longer laugh with or laugh at
i just can't mock or tease
or love or hate the same way
my feelings are not yours
they acquire a whole new
realm and reason in my world
my world...i'm not sure who is in there anymore
there is me and i think that is all there is

so much like yours
and so much not
so much more deeper
so much more shallow
a smile doesn't mean joy
tears don't mean sorrow

hope doesn't leave me hopeful
inspiration is just a word
anger and action aren't different
a pen just as good as a sword

i don't try to be like you
i know i never will
amidst so much activity
i've tried so hard to be still

this isn't a realisation
no it isn't an epiphany
i'm neither shocked nor surprised
to find myself alone
i've never been at peace anyway
there is no place i call home